How Should I Respond to a Transgender Person?

We must first ask the question, what is the source of trans identity or feelings? There are, in fact, multiple potential sources for this behavior, and we should briefly consider them all.

What best describes the source of trans behavior? There are at least four potential areas where the trans lifestyle may originate or may have contributed to a person choosing a trans lifestyle. Trans may be a matter of:

• Mental illness
• Biological influences
• Relational abuse
• Cultural and societal influences
• Sin

The American Medical Association used to classify certain behaviors, like trans behaviors, as a product or symptom of mental illness. But as American culture has shifted leftward, the AMA has also shifted and now defines trans as a matter of preference. This may be a political decision and not a medical one. Some people classify trans as a mental illness because being trans, especially transsexual, denies not only cultural norms, but biological norms as well. Regardless of where you stand on the issue of mental illness, many agree that trans behavior is outside the norms for sexual identity.

Could trans feelings and lifestyle be biological in nature? Yes. We already know from medical research that there are numerous biological problems that contribute to non-social behaviors. People can be biologically predisposed to fits of rage and violence. But even though that may be true, we don’t absolve that person of their responsibility because they are biologically influenced.

Biology is not morally determinative. Biology speaks to ontology, not morality. There does seem to be some evidence that homosexuality is biologically influenced (not determined but influenced). Does this apply to a trans person? I would argue yes. But, as noted, that doesn’t absolve them of responsibility.

There is evidence that many people who adopted a trans lifestyle were previously abused in one way or another. Abuse does terrible things to people and often skews a person’s thinking and emotions to adopt behaviors outside the norm. In such cases, the effects of the abuse have to be dealt with to help a trans person recover.

Cultural and societal influences can be a strong push towards a trans lifestyle. When a person struggles with feeling outside the norm, not being accepted by peers or family, or even simple loneliness, the trans community can look like a refuge. They preach acceptance and push against any and all who would criticize their choices. This community can be especially attractive to teens and young adults, because they’re in the process of determining self-identity and looking for their “tribe.”

Lastly, there is the issue of sin. As already noted, the Bible speaks of the overarching issues being a matter of sin. Though a person’s trans lifestyle may be influenced by mental illness, biological influences, relational abuses, or cultural influences, sin is still a factor.

Many of these same arguments were put forward decades ago about homosexuality. If homosexuality is biologically influenced, does that mean a person is off the hook for that sin? Not at all. The Bible doesn’t treat the issue in that way. There is still the matter of choice and sin to be addressed. The same is true for all other sins. Consider the gluttony, the reality of obesity in our nation, and the current craze for weight-loss drugs. They work biologically. But the decision to overeat and not care well for the bodies God has given us is still ours.

In Scripture, you will not find a specific passage that deals with the modern issue of trans people. But there are passages that broadly cover sexual issues that can be applied to the trans person. Now, it should be noted that these passages pull no punches. They are not what you might consider friendly. However, that does not diminish or dismiss the passages’ truth. The Bible says it straight up, trans is sin. Scripture condemns it. But scripture also gives guidelines for how we are to respond relationally to the trans person. Scripture is both directly truthful and compassionate.

Let’s look at some passages together:

“God gave them over in the lusts of their hearts to impurity, so that their bodies would be dishonored among them. For they exchanged the truth of God for a lie, and worshiped and served the creature rather than the Creator, who is blessed forever. Amen” (Romans 1:24-25).

“And just as they did not see fit to acknowledge God any longer, God gave them over to a depraved mind, to do those things which are not proper” (Romans 1:28).

“Although they know the ordinance of God, that those who practice such things are worthy of death, they not only do the same, but also give hearty approval to those who practice them” (Romans 1:32).

“For I know that good does not dwell in me, that is, in my flesh; for the willing is present in me, but the doing of the good is not. For the good that I want, I do not do, but I practice the very evil that I do not want” (Romans 7:18-19).

“For the desire of the flesh is against the Spirit, and the Spirit against the flesh; for these are in opposition to one another, in order to keep you from doing whatever you want” (Galatians 5:17).

“For the mind set on the flesh is death, but the mind set on the Spirit is life and peace, because the mind set on the flesh is hostile toward God; for it does not subject itself to the law of God, for it is not even able to do so, and those who are in the flesh cannot please God” (Romans 8:6-8).

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It is clear from Paul’s letters that he resolutely condemned sexual sin and its variants. This would include transgenderism and transsexualism under the broader context. And, Paul not only condemned this behavior, he stated plainly that such people will not go to heaven (1 Corinthians 6:9).

Some people are angry with Christians who may use Paul’s language. These moderns condemn anyone who uses such “unloving” language. But they forget that Paul used identical language to condemn “Slave traders, liars, perjurers” (1 Timothy 1:10).

When was the last time you condemned a slave trader? Is it unloving to tell a slaver trader he is going to hell? How about you? When was the last time you lied? In fact, Paul went further, using the same kind of language to condemn, “adulterers… thieves, the greedy, the habitually drunk, verbal abusers, and swindlers” (1 Corinthians 6:9-10).

Habitually drunk? Aren’t we told in our modern day that alcoholism is a disease and not a sin? But Paul doesn’t make that distinction. Paul might be criticized as a “verbal abuser” or “intolerant” because he condemns sin with strong language and an uncompromising stance. But this is only from the faulty understanding of a modern worldview.

Notice that no one complains about the language Paul uses to condemn these other categories. Paul’s language here is not “unloving,” it is simply a declaration of facts where eternal life is concerned.

If transgender and transsexual is only a matter of choice, then those choices should be lovingly discouraged.

If the trans person comes from a history of abuse, then be merciful and kind, and carefully and patiently shepherd that person in the right direction with gentleness.

If the trans person is struggling with a mental illness or biological issue, then realize that the victim is trapped in a way that a simple choice cannot solve.

The sin nature is not limited to the spirit of a person. The sin nature also encompasses the flesh and the mind. We know there are biological influences for anger and violence. There are biological influences for sex addiction. There are biological influences for deviant behavior. As noted above, gender confusion issues and trans behavior are likely also biologically influenced.

Do you realize what this means? It means that such a person is trapped by their own biology and cannot escape their condition on their own. They need compassion and merciful help.

So, no matter what the cause or influence may be of becoming transgender or transsexual, the victim still needs a solution cultivated through a loving, listening, merciful approach that is plain about the truth while being non-endorsing in support.

Let me touch on four areas of our relational response to trans people:

Grief—What is your first feeling when you see a trans person? I believe grief needs to be at the top of our list of emotional responses. The person who becomes transsexual, in this example, is mutilating their body for the sake of a feeling. This is a true tragedy. We need to grieve for them.

Compassion—"There but for the grace of God go I.” Remember that any one of us could have become a victim of our own sin in the extreme. Be compassionate. The trans person must experience your compassion. Remember, there is no compassion without passion.

Truth-Telling—When it comes to the progress of your relationship, there must come a time when you share with the trans person what the Bible says about their condition and your desire to lovingly help them.

Non-Endorsing Support—Treat the trans person with kindness and honor. Look for the image of God in such a person and encourage him or her in that direction. Trans people need help to abandon their condition. Provide it, but always be careful not to verbalize what could be taken as support for their sin problem.

Do Not condemn, make fun of, ridicule, or express disgust at the trans person. Gender confusion is extreme. None of these things will bring the redemptive love of Christ to bear on their situation.

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Counseling—when dealing with a sin or condition that completely takes over someone’s life, it is doubtful they can escape it alone, without help or support. Counseling may be in order, along with other treatment and behavioral efforts.

Repentance—At some point in the trans person’s life they will need to express repentance for embracing a lifestyle which the Lord condemns. There is no question that Scripture condemns a trans lifestyle. Therefore, at some point repentance must take place. Be with the trans person when they reach that point. Just as you likely didn’t come to Christ all by yourself (you had the help of another), walk beside the trans person.

Support Group—If there are support groups in your area for helping a trans person transition back to normality, help him or her avail themselves of it.

Medication for related mental illnesses—there is disagreement over whether trans is a mental illness or not. Speaking as one who is mentally ill, I can testify that the right medication can do a world of good for a person who cannot control or has great difficulty controlling their own thoughts. It is doubtful that a trans person became a victim of their condition in a vacuum. Medical help may be needed to transition back to normality.

The Bottom Line

The bottom line is simple. Is trans sin? Yes. Is a trans person unredeemable? No.

Should we embrace trans people with love? Yes. Should we seek to help the trans person transition out of their condition? Yes.

Just as with any sin or condition, the response of the Christian must be loving, gentle, and yet firm in truth. By doing these things, you may radically change a person’s life and help bring them back into normality. Even more important, you may be able to help them discover God’s love and build a relationship with Him.

We hope this has been a helpful answer for you. We anticipate this issue becoming bigger and bigger in the culture we live in—and we need to prepare our hearts and minds to offer the love of Christ and the truth of God’s Word. May you be blessed as you learn to do the same!
- Tom and Brie

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